We can say no

I had a conversation yesterday that really upset me. It was with one of the girls I work with – she is a little quiet but very nice – she was clearly upset and so I asked what was wrong. She told me she had made friends with one of the guys who comes to our place sometimes and had met him “as a friend” outside. She had got to trust him and thought he really wanted to help – she has a young daughter back home and works to send her family money to care for her child – she really wants to quit and hopes to meet a nice man who understands.


Last week, she agreed to go back to his place for a cup of coffee. He started making moves on her but she was tired and said no. Then he got angry and said that she fucked men all the time and was a little slut, so she should put out now. Then he grabbed her pushed her on to his couch and raped her. After that, he said sorry but that she should have let him fuck her because that’s what she did all the time. He gave her $100 and told her that he was tired and she should go home. She was so angry that she threw the money at him and then left.


She didn’t even consider going to the police because she was a prostitute and had no proof – she thought the police might give her more trouble. What upset me most was when she said that maybe she should have let him fuck her because she was a whore and maybe he was right and then asked me if she should see him again, because he might help her – I told her a guy like that never helps anyone other than himself.


I guess what I want to say, is that it is possible to rape a prostitute – we can say no and when we do, we have the right to be left alone. Too many people think because we fuck for money, we fuck all the time. When you force us, it can be really damaging to us – my co-worker has lost even more of her already small self-respect – she has never been comfortable working and has always been ashamed. Now she says that she thinks that all she is good for is fucking and says she cannot think of facing her daughter.


Friday 4 January 2008 - 08:03AM (EST)