Transitioning

I wrote essentially this blog piece a bit back but lost it when I pulled out my USB card at the wrong time and so I am rewriting it.

Savita and I have now been living together for some time and our lives are melding closer together. But, as with any relationships, changes are inevitable and I am finding that my relationships are changing.

I have lost some good friends, hopefully not totally but at the moment they are more distant: Wei was quite angry that I chose Savita instead of her. My client F and I argued – it seems he really wanted me to stay with John – I think there is a good degree of identification by him with John and he felt rejection but that really is not my problem – I’m sorry to see F. go but it’s up to him. The hunk seems annoyed that I chose Savita in preference to his sister Sylvie.

On the other hand, Sylvie and her lover Chantelle have been welcoming and Savita and I have already had dinner with them. They seem very happy together. Sue has been surprising supportive – I feared she would not forgive me dropping John. As I have already mentioned, Lisa is justifiably mistrustful of me – I need to earn back her friendship – but this is due to my own issues and she encourages Savita a lot.

It is already a couple of weeks that John and my sister have been fucking. She is still glowing and so far it looks good but I want to be careful not to make any judgements – whatever I say will be unhelpful. I am getting used to it and accepting that John now has different priorities. I have not talked to him about anything other than our daughter – a subject that remains key to both of us.

My daughter seems to have taken the whole thing totally in stride and accepts that Auntie Lucy is sleeping with her favourite person, daddy, and Auntie Savita and I sleep in the other room. Fortunately, through careful guidance from John, my daughter has learnt not to discuss these matters at school. I think my daughter is enjoying all the attention – one thing I appreciate is that John is very firm in maintaining my position as her mother – one time she said “mummy” to my sister and John immediately and firmly corrected “Auntie”.

But the most important transition in terms of our relationship is between Savita and me. Savita is not used to sharing a bed and I think she found it hard to get used to coming against my body when she moved. I sleep nude or at most wearing panties but Savita is not used to this and still wears a nightie. The last week I have found Savita is more comfortable and at ease.

Our love making has also developed as we learn more about each other. I find Savita is quite shy at times to express her wishes and I am learning to encourage her confidence. Last week she got me to listen to a podcast called “Mia on Top” or something in which the narrator’s girlfriend wants to see her being fucked – although from what I can tell it doesn’t happen. I asked Savita why she wanted me to listen and she was a bit evasive until I asked her directly if she wanted to see me being fucked by a man and she admitted she was curious and a bit turned on by this. I asked her if she wanted to join and she was adamant that she didn’t want to have sex with a man ever but said that she found my sexuality exciting and was curious. I think I’ll leave that for the moment since it sounds like fantasy and I think the reality might be less appealing to her.

Savita and I are also just enjoying our time together getting to know each other. It is not just the fucking which is still great, it’s being together. We went for a walk in the Botanic Gardens the other week and suddenly we just stopped and kissed passionately. People were staring at us but I was so proud to be showing that I was the girlfriend of my beautiful lover.

I am delighted how we seem to be growing together but I know we still need to complete the transition from fuck mates to life partners – I hope we can make this transition and I hope we can remain fuck mates as well – I hear of many lesbian couples who lose their sexual side – I do not want to do that. In the meantime, I am enjoying the transition and the intense feelings involved.