My Silly Brother

If he hadn’t been so rude to Savita, I would feel sorry for my brother. He is trying hard to be head of the family in place of my father but he has still to learn the ability to work with reality rather than command it. He has argued intensely with me and my sister. Apparently he also told my mother off. He rang up to John and was quite rude without even seeing it.

I think I stirred the pot by my comments about John and my sister. He told my sister that John was not right for her – too old, too sexual – and then rang up John to say he should leave my sister alone since she needed a younger partner – someone who had not been involved with her sister and someone less sexually focused. He also suggested that John “rescue” me from Savita.

John told my brother he was probably right that he was not good enough for my sister but she was not a captive and she was freely choosing her life. John went on to say that we should respect her choice since she was an intelligent young adult. John also told my brother that he was totally wrong about Savita and that she was a wonderful young woman who was making me so happy. He said all my friends were united in wanting us to succeed and he was alienating both his sisters in attacking Savita.

John’s mix of tact and forcefulness seems to have born fruit in that my brother said “I’ll have to think about what you said” rather than just getting angry.
John and I talked about this matter since my sister has been very upset and we are both keen to calm her down. She has always been very close to my brother and she is taking it a lot worse than the rest of us. Mum is coming up to visit us and hopefully that will soothe the tensions.

My sister-in-law called me this morning to say that we were being too hard on her husband. He was just focusing on being a good head of family – which she added was to be increased by one in about 6 months’ time. He is focussed on doing the best for us all and we should respect his wisdom.

I had to swallow my words about his “wisdom” but congratulated her on the news. I also said that I hoped we could sort things out but emotions were running high at the moment and perhaps her husband might consider that he was speaking to adults with their own feelings and desires. The conversation was polite but also very cautious.

I have to say that both Savita and John have been very supportive – both have been insulted by my brother but both are saying that we should be patient and give my brother time to calm down. I think my sister and I are both very lucky in the partners we have!